Vicz's Random Thought Generator

El cine dominicano

2006-09-06T13:42:00.000-04:00

El cine quisqueyano vive en la actualidad un momento interesante. En los últimos años hemos visto varias películas locales nuevas, algunas las cuales han sido éxitos de taquilla de manera nacional. A pesar de este resurgir, el cine dominicano aún yace durmiente en comparación con el de otras naciones como India, Sudáfrica, y muchas otras del tercer mundo. ¿Qué causas podemos inferir nos limitan?

Comencemos por definir el cine dominicano. A mi entender, el público criollo entiende como cine dominicano aquellas incursiones que se dirijan a ellos directamente, filmado en el país con talento dominicano exclusivamente. ¿Consideraría usted como película dominicana una cinta rodada en St. Thomas por Ángel Muñiz, basada en un guión de Armando Almánzar, protagonizada por Gael García Bernal y Eva Longoria, producida por Jerry Bruckheimer? Hablemos de esto luego.

Un aspecto el cual creo limita nuestro cine es pensar que debe dirigirse exclusivamente a una audiencia dominicana. Esto no significa que el tema central de la película tenga que ser ajeno a nuestra cultura. En cambio, el enfoque dado al tema es el que debe ser universal, porque intrínsecamente, toda historia tiene temas universales, como el amor, el racismo, las situaciones sociales, etc. Expongo, de varios ejemplos el primero que surge en mi memoria, "El crimen del Padre Amaro". Se basa en un libro portugués escrito en 1875 extrapolado al año 2002 en México, manteniendo la esencia central de la novela, a la vez siendo un éxito de taquilla en México y recibiendo la distinción de una nominación a Mejor Película Extranjera en los 75os Premios de la Academia en 2003.

El capital disponible para realizar películas es otro bache que nos detiene. Es lógico pensar que el cine es un arte costoso (aunque existen casos excepcionales) que requiere de equipos y personal especializado. Encadenando esto, con la limitación en tamaño del mercado meta, reduce las posibilidades de recibir un ingreso en taquilla atractivo para los inversionistas. Aclaro, una película dominicana según la definición expuesta, tiene como mercado meta solamente cinco millones de espectadores y enfrenta la amenaza de la piratería. En cambio, una película con un enfoque más amplio, tiene oportunidad de ser adquirida por algún estudio o distribuidor internacional.

Ahora, por último, hablemos de nuevo sobre mi propuesta ficticia de cine; creo que se puede definir como cine dominicano. Fuese una película cuyo esfuerzo creativo estaría compuesto en gran parte por talento dominicano; la dirección y el guión son dos partes fundamentales de cualquier película. Utilizo el ejemplo anterior exclusivamente para ilustrar que entiendo que el esfuerzo creativo es el que define la "residencia", por así decirlo, de una película. Algunos argumentarían que el capital utilizado para realizarla definiría la residencia, tema el cual creo sirviera como base para ampliar esta discusión (ver nota).

En conclusión, una película, para ser dominicana, en mi opinión, no tiene que ser dirigida exclusivamente a un público dominicano, ni debe ser realizada solo por actores dominicanos, ni es obligatorio que fuese filmada en el país. Lo que realmente creo que determina la nacionalidad de una película es el talento y el esfuerzo creativo de los realizadores. ¿Qué necesitamos? Técnicos capacitados, disponibilidad de recursos (monetarios y en especie), y quizá un poco más de visión. A fin de cuentas, el cine es arte.

-Víctor J. Nicolás M.

NOTA

La "Academy of Motion Pictures Arts and Sciences" (AMPAS), quienes organizan los premios conocidos como "Oscars", en su Regla No. 14, para las premiaciones de 2006, define una película extranjera como una película producida fuera de los Estados Unidos con diálogos en idiomas diferentes al inglés. Como elegibles, solo califican: películas exhibidas en su país primero, por lo menos por siete días consecutivos, el diálogo debe ser en un idioma diferente al inglés y el país de origen debe certificar que el control artístico de la película haya sido ejercido por talento local. (http://www.oscars.org/79academyawards/rules/rule14.html)

Does Jar Jar Binks Really Deserve a Beating?

2006-06-21T12:06:00.000-04:00

Check the above. It's a screenshot of today's IMDB daily poll. Question was which Star Wars character would you like to punch in the nose. Jar Jar won in a landslide.

I'd love to hear Adam Sandler's "The beating of a Jar Jar Binks". Hilarious. "Ow... Misa Hurt.. Why Yousa bitchslappin me? Annie, help!! Ugh!!!"

Heh, Heh. Mean... Priceless...

Reticence

2006-06-13T20:08:00.000-04:00

The state or quality of being reluctant; unwillingness.

Going back a couple of years - say 8 or 9 - my friend Jesse Norell and I used to get together in our houses and mess around on guitars (I messed around, Jess more or less played). I started playing more and more after that. Jess always wanted to play in a band, and he did while he was here. He always expressed a desire to go down the road of music.

Jesse was never one to think of this as wanting to be famous, or be a star, etc. He wanted to make music he would like to hear; music he identified with. Those bedroom band days passed, but I was willing to bet he would never give up on his dreams. Jesse graduated from highschool and moved to his home state of Minnesota for college.

Needless to say, time made a rift in our lives. I haven't seen Jess in a long while, so my surprise upon stumbling on his webpage was great. Jess started a band called Reticence with his friends in Minn.

Hearing his voice as lead singer of the band brought to mind those days when we used to hang out and play video games. The songs I heard are amazing and exactly the songs Jesse would be associated with (I'm partial to "Up Up Down Down").

I'm reticent to say Jess made it, as am sure he is reticent to stop where he is now and was reticent to give up on his dream; they've done a lot, but the road is wide open for them to cruise on. Check out the band's tracks on myspace, am sure you'll like it instantly.

*Trivia: One of the band's influences is Bachata; I guess living here for a while really got to Jesse, he really digs his bachata beats...

Imagine This Scenario, Please

2006-06-02T15:10:00.000-04:00

Imagine:

Hillary Rodham C. elected President of the United States. I suddenly get a flashback of "Commander in Chief". First thing that comes to mind is Bill Clinton being the first First Gentleman.

Just picture it! A former president now the First Gentleman. I can only begin to imagine the stuff he'd have to put up with.

I can hear Jay Leno: "Did ya hear the new one about Bill Clinton? He was vaccuuming the Oval Office the other day and found a cigar butt on the floor under Hillary's desk. I wonder if he even asked her about it!!!!"

Let's hear what my faithful readers (all 6 of you) have to say.

Enough Said

2006-05-12T17:18:00.000-04:00

www.break.com

To Tell or Not to Tell

2006-04-28T14:05:00.000-04:00

I have been hit with a Shakesperean conflict. Simply put, to tell or not to tell. Allow me to explain. It all started three days ago.

As I was enjoying a light lunch (soup, salad, rice, a serving of beef and some souffle) I casually glanced to my left. There was a jewel of a young woman sitting at a nearby table, simply indescribable (blonde hair, pretty brown eyes, soft light skin, shapely yet fit body, nicely tended feet and hands... alas, I notice too much). She was leaning forward enjoying her meal, and there it was.

It's no mystery why it caught my eyes, it's something you just can't help. Amazing how such a thin strand of white thread and cloth can captivate one's sight. Her pants were a bit below the waist line, cheekily showing anyone who'd look what was usually under them.

I immediately turned to the only other male at my table and informed of my find. A mere "oooh" was his reply. Then the girls sitting with us were wondering what we were so taken with. One of them decided to tell the young lady of her revealed clothing, and the lady promptly corrected her posture to conceal it. Damned whistle blowers!

I was struck with the though that if I had been a gentleman, I would have gently and respectfully informed the young lady of the situation. Instead, I instinctively shared my find with the other male who was with me.

It's difficult to override instincts, I guess. I chose not to tell, and feel rather guilty, but the little devil on my left shoulder is still picturing the sight.

7 things that piss me off

2006-04-17T12:10:00.001-04:00

1. Stupid drivers (maybe, in the near future I'll blog about the disaggregation of this topic).
2. Waiting too much; I'm a patient guy, don't push me too far.
3. Having to work late.
4. Hypocrits, shit-eaters, and gossippers.
5. Repeating things I've already done before (work, i.e.).
6. Being interrupted while in the bathroom (#2 specially).
7. Those damned soft-covered toilet seats...

No victims... I'm getting pissed off just remembering these things...

The Infamous 25 Things

2006-04-17T12:10:00.000-04:00

I'm still waiting for Manu and Moreno...

Here they are:

25 Things That Make Me Happy
My list... in alphabetical order...

Being surrounded by friends
Bubble baths
Buying stuff for myself
Christmas
Cooking (BBQs included!)
Crosswords
Driving on the Highway with a Joe Satriani CD playing
Finding money in washed laundry
Getting recognition for my efforts
Jarabacoa
Lil' Vicz
Lying on the beach, under the shade, doing absolutely nothing
Messing around with my guitars (I wouldn't call it "playing", jaja)
My wife
Pets, specially dogs
Reading a good book
Satisfying my curiosity
Sleeping late
Sushi
Swimming underwater, snorkling, e.g.
The rush of take-off on an airplane
Tom and Jerry
Watching my mother sneeze (makes me laugh, actually)
White water rafting
Writing…

Now:
10 things George said:

1- chillin con lo tigre
2- reading a good book
3- feeding your mind on-line [wiki/imdb/nytimes]/learning new stuff
4- a good laugh
5- munching on the pink taco
6- driving
7- spending time with your bro, mom, and rest of family
8- the beach
9- a kick ass cool rock song
10- eating a good fucking meal

Deme's list

1) Food
2) A good movie (he knows every single actor in every movie, even the extras)
3) Spending time with his friends
4) A good book (all mighty wise one)
5) Video games (link this one with #3)
6) Laughing
7) The beach
8) Antes era el Doll, now it has to be sex
9) El whisky con Coca Cola (strange, but that's what he drinks)
10) I'll have to pinch in and say his family and wife

Andrew's list (exagerated, as always... he did 20!!!)

1.Eating Sushi
2.Sleeping in late on Sundays only to be disturbed to eat sushi from 12am to 4 pm
3.Having passionate sushi Sex…. ( I just figured I could combine 2 things you like into one.. you know like those women sushi plate thingies.)
4.Reading the credits of every movie… while eating sushi.
5.Somehow I think he enjoys sending his car every 3 to 4 months to the mechanic. The mechanic likes to eat sushi… I think he gives some to Vicz.
6.Oh how can I forget… when little Vicz shows up with some food (NO NOT SUSHI!!!) he seems to shine in joy just because he can take it away from the little one.
7.He loves to play his guitar when no one is watching…I’ve heard rumors though that he’s been spotted playing at china town for sushi...baaa´dono.
8.He loves when one of us convinces Javier that we should go over to his house for some R&R…he doesn’t like to do the dirty work….you expected some sushi thing here?? Pos no.
9.I actually think he is really fond of reading the yellow pages…in detail... You don’t believe me?? Have you ever asked him about any random place…like were is Matahambre?…its not some food place you turd!!...he probably knows that its like Sector “something” Esq. “Someshit” # “someotherstuff”
10.Recently I discovered that his number one hobby is reading that IMDB movie web page…hey victor.. Is there any movie come soon featuring a Nigiri or maybe a sashimi?
11.Ahhh… who can forget …uhm… what’s the name of that game…. ..you know the clay….and famous actor crap…..something about brain… well that game…
12.Going to his grandma’s house to eat on Sundays…..damn that boy can fart!!
13.Ehi!!! El monteo papa!!! UF!!!!uff!!!
14.hum…..(Saturday April 8th 2006)
15.Sunday April 9th 2006…..Feeding the poor…you know… when he makes them BBQs… he’s always been the cook…. I bet he’ll soon make some BBQ Sushi…(wow.. that’s a good name for a restaurant). By poor I mean…‘Joselo, Crema, Jorge, Manuel, Deme, Erick, Javis, Elegal, Lil Vicz…….US!!
16.Bombardearle la alfombra a la Mamaporcheta del moreno con fuegos artificiales
17.Using the little Chinese black rock! Jeje
18.After a few drinks he seems to love this chick.. uhm…Cristina Aguilera….. just ask Jose C.
19.Reading ….then reading some more…. And then he reads 2 books at the same time…I heard he’s learning some Japanese so that he can read some sushi making books…
20.At the end of the day… what he enjoys the most is hanging with his friends…. Usually to talk and do nothing… but it’s a nothing that’s so grand that reading a simple line wont get you any closer to understanding.

There you have them. Do you get a feeling these people know me at all???

NATO Phonetic Alphabet

2006-03-27T12:19:00.000-04:00

I'm sure we've all at least heard some of it in several movies, right? Hehe.

For example: "This is Bravo Charlie Fife Niner requesting permission to land."

Here's the complete alphabet. Thanks to Wikipedia.

Have fun.

*Whiskey Tango Foxtrot!
**Delta Oscar Oscar Delta!

25 Things That Make Me Happy

2006-03-24T10:05:00.001-04:00

George tagged me as to write down and publish 25 things which make me happy. I already have my list ready. But first, Lets put an interesting spin on this, shall we?

I propose the following, I am going to tag five people:

1. George
2. Manu
3. Andrew
4. Moreno
5. Deme

What do you five have to do? Write 10 things YOU think make ME happy. When I recieve these 5 lists, I'll publish them as well as my list of 25. This sounds interesting doesn't it? I'd prefer to recieve feedback before I publish my list.

So I'm just waiting for you guys...

If anyone else feels up to this task, go ahead and feel free to make a list for me too. You all know my E-mail... if not... post a comment with your list.

HAVE FUN!

------------------
"Happiness comes in small doses folks. It's a cigarette, or a chocolate cookie, or a five second orgasm. That's it, ok! You cum, you eat the cookie, you smoke the butt, you go to sleep, you get up in the morning and go to fucking work, ok!? That is it! End of fucking list!"

-Dennis Leary, No Cure For Cancer (1993)

Guest Post: "¿Quién entiende a las mujeres?"

2006-03-24T10:05:00.000-04:00

Be advised, this is a guest post. A friend from work came to this realization earlier today; I thought I'd share it with You all.

-----------------------------------
Las mujeres se hacen piercings, se hacen tatuajes en todo el cuerpo, se hacen liftings, tienen partos normales, tienen cesareas, se hacen la liposucción, se engrapan el estomago, se ligan las trompas, se aplican inyecciones de Botox, se aplican inyecciones de alcachofa, se operan las pechugas, se operan las costillas, se operan la nariz, se operan las nalgas, pasan horas quemandose el coco con el secador y aguantando templones de pelo, se depilan con pinzas y con cera caliente, se sacan la cutícula, se sacan las cejas, se perforan las orejas.......

¿¿¿Y NO DAN CULITO, DISQUE POR QUE LES DUELE ??? ¡¡¡QUE TAL!!!!!!

By: Mayor Fckr.
-----------------------------------

Find the Difference

2006-03-08T08:43:00.000-04:00

http://www.dynamicbicycles.com/

Did ya find it yet? I think it's a kickass product... But thats just me.

PS. For this free promo I should get a free bike, heh heh. But then again, with the number of hits I get on this blog I shouldn't count on it!

Quote of the Day

2006-03-07T10:16:00.000-04:00

"Wisdom and love have nothing to do with one another. Wisdom is staying alive, survival. You're wise if you don't stick your finger in the light plug. Love - you'll stick your finger in anything."

-Robert Altman, Movie Director

Fuzzy Wuzzy or Slippy Dippy?

2006-03-03T18:27:00.000-04:00

Read this article first (in spanish, and awkwardly written, I may add).

OK!!! Now you have an idea where this is headed. If you don't, because you were too lazy to read the article (busted!), you'll probably guess anyway - it doesn't take a genious to do so either.

Now, my perspective, and please remember I tend to think in unconventional ways:

5. They work the same either way.
4. Variety is always good.
3. If a guy says he doesn't do fuzzy, place said fuzzy in front of him and watch...
2. There's nothing wrong with either condition, so long as proper hygiene is excercised.
1. Forests are kinda cozy; deserts are kinda sexy*; ergo, anything in between can't possibly be half bad!

You know, I think I am blushing... Crap...

*Both can have kreepy kritters messin around anyway. ;-)

**I'd love to hear some female points of view on this topic and their thoughts on the same applied to males... Girl's rarely say anything... its kinda taboo, I guess...

Here They Are (5 Habits)

2006-03-01T15:41:00.001-04:00

"I've kicked the habit
shed my skin
this is the new stuff
I go dancing in, we go dancing in"
- Peter Gabriel, Sledgehammer

Prior to exposing five of my quirky habits, these are runners-up, in no particular order (alphabetical, actually):

-Can't have my feet tucked in in bed.
-I can't stand people who make funny noises when they eat; it makes me nauseaous. Please, close your mouth. And if you still resonate, please eat away from me.
-I clean my ears daily
-Sometimes I am too lazy to go pay bills.
-Toilet paper rolls must be set so the plies fall from over, not under.
-Toothpaste tubes must be squeezed from the bottom.

My top 5 quirky habits are:

5. I sleep. I sleep a lot. Don't bother me if I am asleep. Unless I have given orders to be awakened. Otherwise, make sure you are at least further than kicking distance.

4. I curse a lot when I drive. Don't tell me not to, I will continue AND I will start taking it out on you.

3. If I am playing dominoes, don't remind me of the rules; I may just send you off to Blow Someone.

2. If Ferris Bueler's Day Off, Back to the Future, or Top Gun are on the tube I gotta watch them until they are over.

And quirky habit "numero uno" is...

1. When I am home, 99.999% of the time I will be wearing nothing but boxers. Please announce yourself before coming over.

My victims:

Bernie
Andrew
Eleri
Mr. Cream
Carmen L.

If you don't have a blog, well... now's a good a time as any to start.

5 Habits

2006-03-01T15:41:00.000-04:00

Lida Virginia has challenged me. She wants me to publish five crazy habits of mine not many people know. This is next to come.

Thinking...

2006-02-24T18:42:00.000-04:00

I have been sitting in front of my PC for hours. Things coming and going. I have been asked to post once more, but frankly, I have not had the time or will to do so. Last couple of weeks have been a rollercoaster.

Last november, on the 14th - I think there was a full moon that night - my then girlfriend told me we were to be parents. She was scared shitless; I was laughing, happy. Three days or so later, we decided to get married, which we did on January 21 this year. Contrary to popular belief, I was happy and I am happier now. I have never loved a woman the way I love my wife.

On Saturday, February 11, we found out our baby girl was in trouble. The next wednesday we had to interrupt the pregnancy. That has been the single hardest decision my wife and I have ever made. On this subject, I only hope no one has to go through that. Some people will. How hard was it? I feel I signed a death warrant, regardless of the fact that the baby was very likely to die and cause serious complications for my wife.

I feel like there's something missing. But I know I'll be alright. Many people have shown us support and shared their experiences as well.

I write this post only to express this.

-Epilogue:

Many people are pro-choice and whatnot. Its a terrible decision to make, never to be taken lightly; to be taken with responsibility. Think of the child's future, not your own. Make the decision as a parent. For me its hard to believe so many people throw lives away. Enough.

Where's Our Flag?

2005-12-23T09:46:00.000-04:00

A country's president is elected by a country. Once he becomes president, he becomes the nation's representative, regardless of his political affiliation. Or at least that is the way it should be.

Several pictures during this week show Dominican President Fernandez rolling around leisurely through various cities. He was on a Christmas mission giving out baskets, which were really plastic bags, containing several items intended for Christmas dinner.

Let's leave political speculation aside, for now, at least. What bothered me the most is the fact that all flags that were waving were the purple flag of the President's party. Where was the Dominican flag? Apparently no one has one, or they weren't given one at least.

I'm not angry, but upset. All public officials talk about the country this, the country that, yet apparently most of them have forgotten, on their outings, that they serve a country, yet promote a party (and this is regardless of which party is at the batter's box).

That's all. Just upset.

Quotes on opportunity

2005-11-24T15:28:00.000-04:00

(http://www.momentum-group.co.uk/i/opportunity.jpg)

When I was writing my thesis on a solution for the free zone lack of competitivity I looked up several quotes about opportunity to include as a cover page. Here are the ones I agreed with the most.

What about you?

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work."
-Thomas A. Edison

"I'm a great believer in luck, and I find the harder I work the more I have of it."
-Thomas Jefferson

"It's choice - not chance - that determines your destiny."
-Jean Nidetch

"In the field of observation, chance favors only the prepared mind."
-Louis Pasteur (1822 - 1895), lecture 1854

"When written in Chinese, the word 'crisis' is composed of two characters - one represents danger, and the other represents opportunity."
- Saul David Alinsky

"This American system of ours . . . call it Americanism, call it capitalism, call it what you like, gives to each and every one of us a great opportunity if we only seize it with both hands and make the most of it."
- Al Capone (1899-1947), U.S. Gangster

"Be ready when opportunity comes...Luck is the time when preparation and opportunity meet."
- Roy D. Chapin, Jr.

A Shot at Haiku...

2005-11-16T16:17:00.000-04:00

Thought of Star Wars, Episode III. Summed it up in haiku. Check it!

Hatred, envy, greed;
Loss of love, friend, and freedom.
All cause and effect.

Of the Ordinary...

2005-11-14T01:50:00.000-04:00

Red Earth, by Andrea Beech

It had been a while since I last wrote something like this. Hope you enjoy it.

-------------------------------------------------------
Ah, to see of the ordinary that which is rare,
to feel of the rose the thorn that is there,
to love of the woman that which is hidden in pain,
is to be gifted with a heart that knows no restraint.

To steal time openly from a titan's iron grip,
to laugh at the fool who thinks writes your script,
to defy the labyrinth which hides endless bliss,
is to have a courage that knows not ever to miss.

To know of two choices that you may pick none,
to realize learning is never over and done,
to understand that differences make us all akin,
is to own wisdom that will never give in.

If heart, courage and wisdom break you away
From a path many think a path that's astray,
Follow this north, this course, this aim;
I wish it would lead you to live by your name

-VN

Wile E. Coyote, Archetype Of Perseverance

2005-11-07T15:02:00.000-04:00

Alexander Ross Animation & Fine Art Gallery

I've received one of those e-mails questioning the integrity of our most favorite and beloved cartoon characters. Among those listed is Wile E. Coyote. He was subject of a joke implying that he spends so much money on ACME products, yet is not quick-witted enough to just buy a cheeseburger, or in his case a "roadrunner-beicon-chess"*.

I choose to stand up for Wile E. I commit myself to this cause because I am a firm believer of chasing that star you've set your eye upon. In life, cartoon or not, you need determination to reach your goals. You also need creativity and inventiveness. Mr. Coyote possesses these qualities in extraordinary amounts. It is not often you encounter someone with such drive and cunning chasing a dream, or maybe just a strong craving.

For years, though unsuccessfully, Wile E. has chased his prey to such lengths as putting his life at risk many times. Miles he has traveled, canyons he has attempted to fly over and bejillions of dollars he has spent on birdfeed with no avail. He has not ever quit. He has not ever satisfied his yearning with meaningless snacks. He knows that which will satisfy him and it is the only thing he wants.

His genius has been proven time and time again as he thinks up such different ways to reach his goal. ACME Corp. owes him a debt so large, I choose to believe they sponsor his numerous attempts. Rocket cars, spring-loaded shoes, ginormous magnets (combined with metal pellets colored as birdfeed, of course), and many other devices have been subject of his "out-of-the-box" mentality, an incredible asset.

Mr. Coyote should be a role model for people worldwide to admire, not poke fun at. These qualities we can observe are rare, unique, if you will. To this date he has yet to achieve his objective, but one thing is true. He has never given up. Kudos, Wile E., my friend. We can only hope the example you continue to set lives on for a long, long time.
*¡pa' lo' tigre!

For further research, please consult the following links: Coyote v. Acme (1), Coyote v. Acme (2)

Re: Your 8 Glasses of Water a Day

2005-11-03T11:55:00.000-04:00

I am sorry to announce that a new notice has been posted on office walls accross the world (see attached image).* They have found a loophole of some sort and going to work now involves something addressed as "work", whatever in the world this means.

www.dumbphotos.com

Do not despair, for I have researched this "work" thing. Dictionary.com gives the following definition: noun, Physical or mental effort or activity directed toward the production or accomplishment of something. Its synonyms include: donkeywork, drudgery, elbow grease, rat race, scutwork, slavery and struggle.

What sort of rubbish is this "work"? Who dares impose upon us such sacrifice of our time? How can we subject ourselves to such "donkeywork"? I say let the donkeys do it!

I say.... Err... I say... Ahhh... Nevermind; f*ck it... Its just a post for the sake of posting.

*This is, of course, Bull-sh*t

--------------------------
PS. Nice to hear from you

Those Tell-tale Keyword Searches

2005-11-01T10:00:00.000-04:00

Its very interesting to see what things people look up in the web. Anything from music, to cars, to funny pictures, to funky, weird porn. If you have been directed to my blog from any of these keyword searches, I am truly sorry. I can only hope you had a laugh as you read any of my dumb-*ss posts.

Just so you guys know, here are the top keywords through which people have accessed this blog:

PS. Bring back cool pics!

Of Staples and Paper Shredders

2005-10-28T16:48:00.000-04:00

www.wmdshred.com

About 5 years, 4 months, and 2 days ago I started at my actual place of work. My first tasks involved removing staples, just that, staple removal. This was because the documents that were stapled together were to be processed in a high capacity scanner in order to digitize archives.

Though not very fulfilling, my work allowed me to get acquainted with staplers and staple removers, paper shredders, and a myriad of other exciting office equipment - don't get me started on the guillotine. Today it was required of me to use those "powers" once more - damn.

We were clearing space by shredding old forms and useless letters. Needless to say my skills did come in handy. But I noticed one very important thing: my powers are diminished now. I am so much slower it's not even funny.

However, I also noticed another new skill. Just like blind men realize their hearing improves over time after losing their sight, I understood I can bullsh*t my way out of things a lot faster. I spent the morning shredding stuff and removing staples at a slower rate, which in turn allowed me to cunningly evade some backed up things with that excuse!

So, two lessons: one, you never lose something without getting another back, and, two, removing staples sucks - as do paper cuts (**OW!!!**).

PS. Hope the weather in Europe is good enough to travel through! :-)

Deja Vu

2005-10-25T15:39:00.000-04:00

http://cloudking.com/artists/joel-biroco/works/deja-vu_large.jpg

Deja Vu has to be one of the most enigmatic experiences to human beings. Long existing, and long investigated, deja vu remains unexplained by science.

Although there are many ideas as to what it may be, the "most likely candidate is that deja vu is an anomaly of memory; it is the impression that an experience is "being recalled" which is false. This is substantiated to an extent by the fact that in most cases the sense of "recollection" at the time is strong, but any circumstances of the "previous" experience (when, where and how the earlier experience occurred) are quite uncertain"/1. I am, however, of the 'romantic' belief that deja vu may be precognition, not going so far as calling it prophecy - imagine, The Prophet Vicz.

I choose to write of this because today, around 1pm, I was in "La Sirena" - a department store in La Mella - and I had a deja vu. I remembered having seen what happened today years ago at bedtime, and at that moment years ago, thinking that It was strange that I was in a department store with two women I had not at the moment met. But it did happen. I was indeed in a store with two women I met recently - both whom I adore.

So, precognition or not, having that deja vu at least reminded me of one thing; you never really know through which paths life will lead you. We have a saying in Dominican Republic, not near as nice or positive as my previous sentence. It's short and sweet: "No escupas pa' 'riba", meaning don't spit upwards. You take your pick.

1/wikipedia.org, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deja_vu

Las Matas de Farfan

2005-10-06T16:18:00.000-04:00

Although I was born in beautiful Santo Domingo, my father's side of the family hails from the Dominican "deep south". My great-great-grandparents came to the island and moved to this side from Haiti. They settled in Las Matas de Farfan, a then mainly agricultural town. The town name translates to "Farfan's Trees" or "Farfan's Plants".

Las Matas de Farfan is about 40 minutes away from San Juan de la Maguana and 30 minutes away from the Dominican border with Haiti. It is one of the biggest towns in the south (which is really the west, but who am I to change things?). Its main activity is farming. They still hold a "mercado", or market, three times a week, selling diverse items in the main street.

I once asked my father about the name but i don't remember what he told me at that time. It came to mind last time I was there, but I didn't ask. While driving around with my dad, we pulled over in one of the parks to meet some people. I wandered away and found a bronze plaque by the shade of the trees. In general terms it stated that the town was founded by a man called Bartolome de Farfan in 17XX (I'm not sure). My dad came around, pointed at the trees above the plaque, and said, "Oh, those are "las matas de Farfan"." They are tamarind trees. Just thought it would be interesting to point this out.

Apologies...

2005-10-04T18:21:00.000-04:00

Believe me, I've been trying to put together a new post. Its just that work has gotten in my way (jeje). I leave you with this:

Dumb Criminals
Dumb Laws

Enjoy...

No Worries!

2005-09-28T14:54:00.000-04:00

Truth is the Internet is a heck of a resource if you got time on your hands. You can find just about anything (even if it doesn't make sense). There are also bunches of tools and other resources out there. You ask where this post is going? I'll get there soon enough, but first, a warning - don't ever search online for "bukkake" and "snowblowing". If you do, don't say I didn't warn you; ignorance is sometimes bliss.

Back to business. I got an e-mail regarding some sort of shooting practice at Puerto de Sans Souci. And it hit me - "Sans Souci" like "Sans Serif". Sans serif is a term used to describe fonts like Arial, which, unlike Times New Roman, don't have a little peak in its design (notice the capital T has peaks on its sides). Sans is French for without, Serif, well i didn't look it up*.

So what does the word "souci" mean? Concern. Among its synonyms** are: worry, heebie-jeebies (hee hee), uneasiness, fuss, fretfulness, etc. The combination really makes you think, huh?

Sans souci, without concern, no fuss, spare the heebie-jeebies, zero stress - I could go on and on. These two words, which I figure were not picked at random, represent the spirit of the Dominican Republic in the good way. Allow me to illustrate: we have kickass beaches, cool mountains, and a lot of ecotourism locales, good food, good drinks and good people.

Anyway, am going off topic. I'll stop now. In conclusion, I had never given it much thought and definitely never looked it up, but now, as my old spanish teacher at school used to say "puedes comer". I can eat because I learned something new. Come to think of it, this gives a new meaning to being the all-knowing (it explains a lot). But as aussies put it, NO WORRIES MATE!!!

X-TRA CREDIT: Google: "Sans Souci"

* (I ended up looking for it anyway)Serif: n., a fine line finishing off the main strokes of a letter, as at the top and bottom of M. (www.dictionary.com)

**worry, all-overs, angst, ants, apprehension, botheration, butterflies, cabin fever, care, cold sweat, concern, creeps, disquiet, disquietude, distress, doubt, downer, drag, dread, fidgets, flap, foreboding, fretfulness, fuss, goose bumps, heebie-jeebies, jitters, jumps, misery, misgiving, mistrust, nail-biter, needles, nervousness, panic, restlessness, shakes, shivers, solicitude, suffering, suspense, sweat, trouble, uncertainty, unease, uneasiness, watchfulness, willies, worriment. (www.dictionary.com)

Bubble Wrap

2005-09-27T12:23:00.000-04:00

Bubble wrap friggin rocks!!!

Someone left a big piece of bubble wrap on my desk. I feel SO loved!

I'm gonna go and annoy someone now...

*pop* *poppitty* *pop* *poppitty* *poppitty* *pop*

Your 8 glasses of water a day...

2005-09-26T16:16:00.000-04:00

I've discovered another benefit to drinking your 8 glasses of water a day. We know your skin tone is improved, you help your body expel toxins easier, blah, blah, blah, etc., etc., etc. My discovery? It can help reduce your workload!!!

How so? Simple... you have to drink it. Its kind of hard to drink water and do something else at the same time. Multitasking while drinking water is improbable (unless you carry a beer helmet to work, or sip through a straw - but these are mere details). This means that if you increase your water intake you are reducing your work time and its time that cannot be legally claimed back from your employer because you need it to survive! HA! GENIUS! And the bonus... you get to pee MORE!!!

Imagine this!!! Who can claim you are a slacker if you are in the toilet? Women have an added advantage, you must use the toilet. Dang! We should have seen this before!

So in conclusion if you drink your 8 glasses of water a day, you get added benefits that reduce your workload. Unbelievable. Now, your homework - research the effects of adding coffee to this equation (Hint: coffee is a diuretic)

TTFN!